I decided to reserve Friday for discussion of All Things Guys, you guys. And I’ve received some complaints. Guys are so central, my dissenters argue–so woven into the very fabric of our lives–that to consign or “ghettoize” them to a single day out of the week is not only backward but, ironically, antithetical to my purpose: namely, to recognize and celebrate the invaluable contribution of the Guy people to history (of ma pants).

Anyway. To my dissenters I say: suck it.

And let me introduce you to my high school crush, Jeff Larson.

Sigh! So dreamy. And yeah. That perve-faced weirdo next to him is me. I can tell you exactly what I was thinking, too.

My shouldersth touching hith armpit! My shouldersth touching hith armpit! My shouldersth touching hith armpit! My shouldersth touching hith armpit! My shouldersth touching hith armpit! My shouldersth touching hith armpit! My shouldersth touching hith armpit!              

Don’t ask me why I lisp in my thoughts, okay? I just do.                                      

Anyway. Jeff and I barely talked in high school, but we’re facebook friends now. And in some countries? That’s practically the same as married.

xo

*Do you have a hottie you’d like to promote? Email DearMissMaude@gmail.com and share the love!

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